Relationships make us human. They're complicated, mysterious, and the essence of life and our humanity. Research shows that the quality of our relationships mitigates the harmful stress effects of life. Below are resources I frequently recommend to people learning to date more consciously by understanding themselves and others more thoroughly.
Attachment theory, communication, conflict
Deepening, counseling, enriching
Authentic, fulfilling relationships require us to navigate distressful moments without retreating into our conditioned behaviors. This book sheds light on how we can handle those times in ways that deepen and strengthen each other and ourselves, by establishing relationship safety and trust, by sharing our true emotional selves with each other, even when it feels weird to do so.
Attachment theory, conflict management, dating
Informative, direct, educational
We all operate a different comfort levels when it comes to intimacy and relational closeness. This manifests through certain behaviors during times of relationship distress, or even when just dating. By understanding 'attachment', you can notice what you and your partner(s) bring to the table, and how to problem-solve those annoying cycles of emotional conflict you and/or your partner(s) find yourselves in.
Codependency, enmeshment, individuation
Sex-centered, visceral, prescriptive
A common complaint in relationships is that the passion has died and the spark is gone. The energetic pulse has given way to resentment, boredom, and smothering dullness. What might be happening is that you've become too dependent on each other, emotionally speaking. Dependency tends to smother a fire. This book serves as a graphic 'how-to' on bringing that fire back - by separating yourselves as individuals, and remaining intimately together when and where it counts.
Attachment Theory 101
Your 'Attachment' Style 101